How to make a versatile and yet effective alarm clock?
Are you late to the office every morning?
Do you have difficulties waking up?!
Don't have enough money to waste on an alarm clock that does nothing but show you the time and fail to wake you up?!?
Fear not! The solution is right here!
1. Get a cat*.
2. Go to sleep.
*preferably a mutant cat with "Amazing Eating Abilities"™ .
While it may look dead during the day hours, rest assured your problems are now over!
From now on you will be woken up at various hours to the gentle and soothing screetch of a hungry cat's attempt at meowing.
No amount of shoes, pillows, blankets or ballistic thermo-nuclear missiles thrown at him will deter it from its cause:
To get you out of bed and towards the kitchen cupboard holding its precious food.
From now on you will arrive to any morning meeting looking like the brisk professional that you are!
Inquire today at your local street garbage disposal unit.
May require exposure to hot bath, intoxicating substances, allergy to flee colars and neutering.
Do you have difficulties waking up?!
Don't have enough money to waste on an alarm clock that does nothing but show you the time and fail to wake you up?!?
Fear not! The solution is right here!
1. Get a cat*.
2. Go to sleep.
*preferably a mutant cat with "Amazing Eating Abilities"™ .
While it may look dead during the day hours, rest assured your problems are now over!
From now on you will be woken up at various hours to the gentle and soothing screetch of a hungry cat's attempt at meowing.
No amount of shoes, pillows, blankets or ballistic thermo-nuclear missiles thrown at him will deter it from its cause:
To get you out of bed and towards the kitchen cupboard holding its precious food.
From now on you will arrive to any morning meeting looking like the brisk professional that you are!
Inquire today at your local street garbage disposal unit.
May require exposure to hot bath, intoxicating substances, allergy to flee colars and neutering.
